So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
My mom just informed me that my dog licks their toes while her and my dad are having sex. I'm apartment searching.
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
I need a good reason NOT to eat this entire jar of nutella right now
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
I got laxative. And a toothbrush. Because who wants to buy just laxative on a Friday night?
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
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