Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
I just jerked off in front of my dog to make him jealous of my thumbs. There are consequences for stealing the last cheeto!
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
Remind me to tell you all about the topless girl on the street who attempted to taze me.
It's like the drive of shame on fucking Christmas. Happy birthday Jesus
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
Randomize
