Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
it wasn't lemon gatorade
I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
Did that sound smart? Cuz beneath the boozy exterior beats the heart of a fucking scientist.
I'm reading 50 shades of grey and masturbating while he's doing insulation downstairs. Maybe I can get him to bring me a sandwich
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