It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
John tries to set me up, and she has 1 arm. I'm a nice guy, but 2 arms is kinda a requirement
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
I've reached too hung over to move status will you bring me something to drink?
I moved out 2 weeks ago remember?
Can you ship it to me then?
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
Randomize
