Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
You know its been a rough night when you wake up and the first thing you remember is your mom going skinny dipping.
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
You're always adorable, but when you're drunk, you're like Chia Pet adorable.
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
Dad stumbling and puking in the White Castle parking lot = Father's Day success
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
He fell asleep during FOREPLAY. Sober!!!
Im outta here as soon as my phone charges wtf
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
Randomize
