Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
areolas are like halos for boobs.
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
Keep your fingers crossed. If I get to go to a Stanley Cup game I'll give you the blowjob he deserves for taking me. Because hes definitely not gettin it.
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
Randomize
