He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
Turns out he's old enough to be my dad. I'm so excited. I've never had a sugar daddy before. What should I ask for first!? Want anything?
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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