We won't sleep together?
I think i peed on brittanys purse
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
Did you just see the Batmobile???
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
Bring fortys. we have the duct tape. its onnn mothafuckaaaa
I think I left my chapstick at your house when I tried using your penis as a catapult and flung it on the floor. Be a dear, and try to see if you can find it.
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
Sometimes you have a glimmer of a heart and then I immediately remember you are dead inside.
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
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