We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
He says I tipped the waitress ten dollars because she "smelled like pigs in a blanket."
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
Are you drunk? You left me a voicemail at 5:59 AM of you making dolphin sounds.
Randomize
