I just cut my nipple shaving
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
you were so drunk when the pizza guy got there you told him that you didn't have any money and would trade him the pizza for 3 Porno movies and he totally did it. I may never have to pay for pizza again
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
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