so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
I walked into the bathroom and there's this 6'5" cop washing his hands. He looks at me and goes, "Heard you singing outside. Sound real pretty."
No more tequila EVER.
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
How was your weekend?
My girlfriend decided the best way to get my mind off of my dog dying was to break up with me via text
Randomize