im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
you came home soaking wet, and when I asked where your umbrella was, you pulled it out of your bag and were so proud you kept it dry.
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
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