I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
You tried to convince me you were sober by doing jumping jacks. For an hour.
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO GET MY FUCKING CUPCAKES WHEN THE GROUNDSWORKER I HOOKED UP WITH IS LOITERING IN THE VENDING AREA
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
Randomize
