can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
Hiking for a first date sounded like a good idea in theory because there was absolutely no possibility of me blacking out. In practice, I'd rather black out than go through what I just went through.
Randomize
