And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
So after your set last night some 42 year old woman bought me a drink, professed her love for your music, and then made out with me last night because she thought I was you. Thank you.
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
I've never heard "I will drown your mother in vanilla pudding" as an insult before, and then last night happened.
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
Randomize
