The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
Sooo... I woke up in the shower this morning. It was on.
I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
My dad just came home, said hi to mom and me in the kitchen, and then said "I'm gonna go inject my blood with iguana saliva".
I think I'm going to inject the gummy vitamins with vodka
I'm glad you're using your medical degree for some good for once
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
Legitimately sent a work email with "Hey, you kids, get off my lawn" as the subject line.
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
Seriously. I'm like, "Wait, we are actually talking about physics in the middle of sex and its ACTUALLY erotic because you're so fucking intelligent I'm turned on?"
Randomize
