i'm returning your mother's day gift to finance my alcoholism over the next week.
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
I'm literally trapped as the little spoon on a mattress on the floor of an unfinished basement with a professional athlete snoring in my hair
Next time you decide to post pictures of yourself in your underwear on facebook, please don't tag me as your bulge.. My mom spent 10 minutes looking for me in that picture. I had to tell her I was hiding.
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
Randomize
