I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
There was a dismembered bleeding penis in my dream last night. That's some serious Freudian shit.
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
WEED BROWNIES! He put weed in my brownie mix! And he got it from YYYYOOOOUUUU!
Look at the bright side mom. After 20 years dad is still capable of surprising you!
Shut up Max.
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
Randomize
