No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
You picked me up and threw me on a barstool and shoved shots in front of me.
Thats like the definition of a good friend
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
Fuck Sunday funday. Fuck real pants. Fuck the sun. Fuck Jameson. Fuck my life. Yes, I am hungover as shit sitting in my office eating bacon.
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Randomize
