As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
I'm at the airport and there's a guy wearing all camoflash to go hunting .. Should I bump in to him and say woahh sorry didn't see you there?
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
the only good thing about breaking up with him while naked was that i got to make a forgetting sarah marshall reference
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
Got home & pissed on my moms carpet like a bear in the woods. I woke up to a picture message with me passed out on the floor with my pants down & hands covering my face. I've had an awkward week
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
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