Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
Who knew there were so many rules and judgements about laying on a kitchen floor. I'm all like I'm resting. It just happens to be on a kitchen floor.
I fell asleep in the tanning bed, naked, for an hour and a half and I guess they couldn't wake me up so they called the fire department...and they came in while I was passed out naked...
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
my penis made a compromise with my morals
If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
Randomize
