walked into a party last night, i saw 3 ex gfs standing in a circle talking to each other...that's the quickest u-turn i've ever made in my life.
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
Since your rent is paid til the first, we decided to use your apartment as the beer pong room. We apologize in advance for losing your security deposit.
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
Drunk text the hot guy two doors down confessing my love for him.... He gave me a thank you card today.
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
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