She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
you really are a gigantic fucking slut.
sidenote: just remembered sarcasm does not translate through text
it's probably a bad thing that i wasn't even offended, huh?
i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
Did you ever feel like going into a planned parenthood and performing an abortion in front of them?
Umm..who the fuck is this?
Oh shit
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
Dick very happy bro
and eventually we just all took our pants off
Randomize
