I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
She said she didn't have time to shave "there"
Then she shouldn't have had time to order the lobster.
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
You can't buy drugs with a ziplock bag full of quarters, chuck-e-cheese coins, and a starbucks giftcard.
watch me
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
Remember when we partied so hard that dude died and it cockblocked you hooking up with my sister?
I forgot that happened. That's the second dude that died on a vacation I've been on
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
Why would you call when you knew I'd be having sex!?
Why would you answer?
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
Yes, the maid of honor did just deep throat the mic during the toast. How do I follow that?
Randomize
