garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
The bride is so wasted, she fell into her cake.I wanna be on her level
I think I'm gunna glue a sign to my head that says "WAKE ME UP BEFORE 7!" And go to sleep and hope a kind passer by wakes me up for my exam .
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
Randomize
