thus making me awesome and them whores
i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
and that's when the elephants and penises started dancing on the ceiling
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
I just handed a girl a slice of pizza and she handed me her number. Is this how Vegas hookups normally begin?
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
Randomize
