I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
captain morgan taught me last night that resee's puffs are way better when eaten straight out of the sink.
I am about to be in my happy place. (the shower with a 6 pack)
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
I'm with the hottest fuckin fire fighter right now. I'm ready to fake my own death.
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
Who else will cuddle and watch the Bachelor with me then finger bang me during the rose ceremony
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
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