Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
you kept trying to make scrambled eggs with 3 hardboiled ones.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
I just told a kid I was in a wheelchair because Santa shot me due to me being on the naughty list. You should have seen this little bastards face
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
I just got through airport security with 5 grams of weed in my back pocket. Either I deserve a metal or the government is slacking
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