The girl behind me at the dollar store said couldn't wait to get her permit, then requested a pregnancy test. God I love being home.
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
We need to talk about our relationship.
I just won a bet involving 10 tequila shots. You've got about 3 minutes
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
I woke up to my roommate checking my pulse
The Olympian is in my bed
How long do I have to listen to him talk about the chickens before telling him I just really want to fuck? Note: it's already been twelve minutes.
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
Randomize
