I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
This mustache is awesome. I can't pass by a mirror without looking in it and thinking damn, I'd like to give that guy a handy.
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
Randomize
