i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
A homeless man in dtwn SF was blasting lil wayne and singing at the top of his lungs. I kinda wanted to give him my life savings
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs".
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
Randomize
