And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
Ihop lady gave me free pancakes for being sober this time
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
Wait... why were you finger painting at one in the morning?
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
Randomize
