Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
winnie the pooh came out of nowhere and offered me a burrito...it was a fucking amazing burrito.
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
found a better reason to procrastinate than the usual sunday-don't-give-no-fucks. literally every one of my textbooks is soaked in captain. can't turn a page without gagging.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
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