quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
Do you think it would be weird to wear a shirt that says 'big fun small package' from an ex for a first date?
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