even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
i grabbed his hand and told him i loved him and then he looked down and said "i love...mallomars" and shoved like three in his mouth. never been so embarrassed.
I just bought a vibrating toothbrush with my parents FSA insurance card because I'm too broke for a vibrator. New.Level.Of.Low.
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
Bro, there is a rent-a-cop selling syringes out of the trunk of his car. This is why I hate the DMV.
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
I sent him this really overly apologetic text asking him out. It was just sad. Not even 27 shots of whiskey can grow me a self-esteem.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
Now I have the opportunity to have Chris Pratt or Channing Tatum?!? What a time to be alive.
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
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