I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
You left a skid on my bar stool!!!!
Oops! Sorry about getting stool on your stool!
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
It's one of those days where you order the free Papa John's pizza so the delivery guy can bring you Coke to go with your rum. The tip was more than the order.
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
Randomize
