So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
This is the last time I call a hotel to see if you or some random guy paid for the room last night.
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
There is a guy dressed as Captain America in the theatre. I want to make out with him even though I have no idea what he looks like. Wish me luck, I'm going in.
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
Randomize