The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
Some lady found my secret pooping bathroom at work. Do I fight her Highlander style? I made or may not be fashioning a crude sword from seat covers and toilet paper rolls.
Do it. DO IT. There can be only one.
I was a bouncer for about 90 seconds until the real bouncers figured out that I was doing their job
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
Fuck you know you drunk when you start signing the Masson impossjvke song to entourage yourself to pee
Why are there condoms taped to the handle of Tito’s?
I get horny when I drink, pregnant when I fuck and I never lose the booze unlike my purse
Randomize
