I would go down on you faster than GM stock
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
I was wondering if I fell or perhaps got hit by a truck, then I remembered, it's cause I did a splits contest at the bar
I found the bottle of ketchup and sobe you tried to hide in the middle of the lawn last night
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
I told him I'd go cook him breakfast, but ended up passing out on the kitchen floor in the fetal position spooning the dog
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
Randomize
