You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
I sat down with you and helped you write your will last night. I was THAT convinced that you weren't waking up.
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
Thank God I didn't lose my virginity to that asshole. That woulda been like winnin a raffle ticket for a free bag of dog shit. But with like a really pretty bag. A pretty bag full of dog shit.
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
He taped a champagne bottle to both his hands and called himself edward champagne hands. At one point he poured some on his lap and said " Just needed to make sure my dick got some too"
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
How many fucks given?
0.12846
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