so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
Just used "I used to work as an inflatable toy operator" as a pick up line. Freshman frenzy is great...
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
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