I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
Also cheers for the reminder to check last night's texts. It's been a magical adventure through drunk me's thought process.
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
Randomize
