Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
Then she yelled something like "YOU HAVE SO MANY FORKS!" before collapsing on the floor
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
Definitely just found that pen in the microwave. What the fuck.
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
I JUST HAD A FLASH MEMORY OF DOING A SHOT OF WHISKEY WITH MY BEER YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO PUNCH ME IN THE FACE TO PREVENT THAT FROM HAPPENING.
She asked me to dress as captain planet for halloween and told me she was gonna suck the pollution out of my dick.
Your shirt... Was in my pants
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
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