My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
Tried to buy Xanax from my boss last night. Wrong Mike.
i dont even know how to be here
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
Yeah but then he looked at me bleeding on the floor, said oh i guess you need to go to the hospital now, and left
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
New level of stoned. My Terry's Chocolate Orange didn't 'whack-and-unwrap' so I ate it like an apple.
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
I told the cops they couldn't arrest me until they found my shoe. Now I have the grant county cops looking for my heels by the rail road tracks.
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