So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
Laying in bed nude eating a Big Mac with a cat. It's gonna be a good year.
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
I think you're overestimating how drunk I was
You said your pillow felt like the ocean...
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
Randomize
