He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
Someone sharpied 'shit show' on my tits. Someone with excellent penmanship
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
You convinced me that eggnog and rum is a great moisturizer.
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
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