So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
I'd like to introduce you to my friend, Moderation. Enjoy each other's company this weekend.
Your friend and I already don't get along
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
He fell backwards into a full bathtub but didn't spill a single drop of the beer in his hand. What a pro.
Decided to stop by the store on my walk of shame. I must really look like shit, a six year old girl just walked up to me and said "my mommy wanted me to tell you Jesus loves you." Thanks kid.
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
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