A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
Why is our fridge full of girl scout cookies and rum?
You told me to go grocery shopping.
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
Checked my bank account this morning...apparently I went to 7-11 at 4am and spent $22 on taquitos. New all time low for me.
I ate all of them. New all time low for ME.
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
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