He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
Just explain how I got from the bar to a house I've never been in, waking up to a cop in uniform ripping a bong
Mom brought home a 36 pack of Smirnoff and was all "ring any bells?" and then winked. I'm scared. What does she know?
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
Randomize
