PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
If the Four Horseman of the Apocalypse gang banged each other and had a kid, it would look like the creature I woke up next to this morning.
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
Woke up with a retainer in my boxers and about ten chicks passed out around me. now I feel like something out of Cinderella, trying to find whose teeth fit in the glass retainer.
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
When I took off my jeans he became more excited about my Elmo underwear than sex but to be fair, who can blame him. They're awesome undies.
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
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