No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
vaguely remember the bartender stopping me outside last night so he could pull the duct tape out of my hair
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
Hey remember that night when you sang Fergie to me? I think that's the exact moment in time when the thought "I could be faithful to this man" came into serious consideration.
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
He wants another date...I mean he's cute, but I just am not ready to give up my glamorous single-girl lifestyle here.
you mean the one where you drink out of the carton and don't wear pants?
Yeah, and pee with the door open. It's the little things.
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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